I guess I haven’t reached that point in my life yet when I’m so jaded (or is it cynical) that nothing will surprise me. I say this after reading an interesting little article in the London TimesOnline. They had the chance to interview Lloyd Blankfein, the Chairman and CEO of Goldman Sachs. It seems he’s convinced – or at least he’s convinced he can convince us – that Goldman serves “a social purpose.” As a matter of fact, Mr. Blankfein is so enamored with the self-importance of Goldman that he proudly proclaims he’s “Doing God’s Work.” Wow…
Just to refresh our memory:
Goldman received $10 Billion in Tarp Money
Goldman received $12.9 Billion of government money through AIG
Goldman received $20.9 Billion in FDIC debt guarantees
Goldman, restructured as a “bank holding company” borrows at the Fed Window (at basically no cost)
Oh, and one more thing: Goldman will be paying $21.9 Billion in bonuses for 2009. I don’t begrudge them bonuses, after all: they’ve had a helluva year. Although some of that might be due to their oligarchical position within the federal government. It would be nice – every once in a while – if Goldman would send a little thank you nod our way; maybe a quick wave or even a wink. I guess I’m saying that when you’re screwing me this bad, a little dinner wouldn’t hurt.
John Lennon stirred up quite a spot of bother when he said: “We’re more popular than Jesus now.” Have to admit though, that seems like such a trifle compared to the CEO of Goldman Sachs. I mean, who cares if you’re more popular than Jesus? Mr. Blankfein is angling to BE Jesus.
A few months back, as part of a Tin Foil Hat Production, I mentioned CIT’s desperate need for funds and the Fed’s decision not to bail them out. Why is this noteworthy? After all, I don’t believe the Fed should bail anybody out. I cheer wildly to see Ford record surprising profits while competing against the Frankenstein creation that is GM, just as I quietly root for GM’s justified demise. But here we are, with CIT declaring bankruptcy and the hypocrisy is just too much. Apparently, a company focused on financing small business (70% of the entire factoring business!) is not worth a bail out from the administration that claims to look for ways to spur Small Business. Color me cynical, but I think CIT’s main problem was a lack of Goldman-Sach’s alumni on its board…
The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, the Secretary of the Navy, the Secretary of the Air Force, the current and former Defense Secretaries as well as the President of the United States have all agreed there is no need for more F22 fighter planes beyond those currently contracted. Senators from states where the F22 is built, however, have taken $369 million from an environmental clean-up fund and tacked it onto a defense bill in order to keep building military planes nobody wants during a recession no one can afford, thus creating pork no one will eat. In related news, the budget deficit reaches a record $1 trillion and a little noticed study established that Congress can’t even spell the word “irony”.
Goldman-Sachs reports RECORD earnings during the worst recession this nation has seen since the Great Depression. Shortly after repaying $10 billion in tax-payer bailouts, Goldman trounced analysts’ estimates and continues to reap billions in profits trading in derivative markets. (Actually, they trade in unregulated tertiary derivatives – that’s a derivative of a derivative of a derivative of something that actually exists, for those of you keeping score at home). In the mean time, CIT – a company specializing in loans to small businesses and entrepreneurs – apparently serves no national interest to the Fed and has been told: “Enough is enough. No more bailouts” (No soup for you!) and is desperately searching for funding while on life support. In related news, keys members of the Treasury, the Fed, the administration’s key economic advisers and the principles of Goldman-Sachs have all agreed on a new secret handshake and expect their membership-only lapel pins to arrive shortly.
After reading these items you might find yourself a little confused… apprehensive even. You might wonder why the press does not present these bits of news together, in a way that reflects the absolute absurdity of the body politic today. You might even find yourself becoming a bit fearful: wondering how we got to such a criminally illogical place (through the looking glass, as it were). But not to worry. Congress is going to help us understand what happened to the economy and how we got here. They’ve announced a commission, chaired by a Democratic: the former Treasurer of California and a Republican: a former representative from California, to “examine the causes of the financial crisis” our nation currently faces. It seems their related contributions to bankrupting the 8th largest economy in the world (the once proud State of California) were of little concern. In related news, it has been announced that registered sex offenders will be heading up a commission to explore marital fidelity and Governors.
Read individually, many of these news items are innocuous. But taken as a whole, it becomes less and less difficult to suspect a conspiracy permeates politics. Maybe this is all coincidence. Maybe a Tin Foil Hat Production can be made to look quite stylish:
But in the end, a proper response to our government was perfected over 30 years ago by John Landis in the movie Animal House. He foresaw those in power telling us “All is Well” and – prophetically – he foresaw the results. Who am I to improve on perfection:
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